Training and wordquests

Bone Density training = Iron - 500 words passed.

So Nanashi a longen time ago when he was a Kirigakure ninja, in the past, was training himself in a deadly Kaguya exercise which wasn't exactly deadly to Kaguya's, but to non-Kaguya, and fortunately Nanashi is a Kaguya which makes ihm lucky entirely because he is not susceptible to weaknesses by the weaklings known as non Kaguya, since they do not possess the superior physiology as the Kaguya do, which in that instance, makes Nanashi superior entirely. In this instance, he went to the clan leader who happened to be an old man with wrinkles on all of his features, face fat and ugly, yet he is most powerful around, and nobody can deny his power or wisdom that shines from everyone of his orifices.
Nanashi was in old Kaguya's room, bowing to his liege as it was customary to do so, lest he gets his butt kicked and beaten to a bloody pulp merely for being disrespectful to the ugly and such a stupid old man that happened to just be really powerful.
"Lord retard, I come to seek the methods to learn about the Kaguya's iron bones in strengthening the density so I may kick ass and honor your name in kicking ass... BY THE METHODS YOU TAUGHT ME SIR!" Nanashi says with charming enthusiasm.
"Very well, I'll tell you what to do, hoho, you need to hoho just hoho get to a hoho forest and hit yourself hoho constantly hoho with a tree hoho or just fall down on yourself hoho and keep getting hurt hoho, that's how we are ALL that powerful! Hoho."
"Wait... is that why there are so many members in the clan with below average intelligence and are basically fucking retarded?"
"Pretty much, but hey! It's worked for the last several generations, and we ain't dropping traditions. Except for the pedophile boy toy part..." He facepalmed, "Who knew our ancestor Kimimaro was such a freak of nature?"
"Yeah yeah, blah blah blah, he got fondled by the late Orochimaru, blah blah blah, got killed from lupus--"
"Cancer."
"Right, and from a few sand dust in his eyes, I don't care, but thanks for the info, oh slimmest and smartest of elders."
"Yes yes... now go away, I have a hello kitty commercial to watch."
"Right right, favorite show of mine as well."
"Then you are destined for greatness! All of our strongest Kaguya have shown an interest in Hello Kitty... and it is by your right from now on, to be considered strong incarnate."
And so, Nanashi left off to some forest, doing as asked as he kept leaping up from a branch as he felt several bones break, each time wailing and freaking out, if it weren't for the Kaguya medical nin there mending him with high level techniques, he would've been so deformed.
"SHIT! THIS HURTS LIKE A MOFO!" Nanashi wailed.
"Well... it wasn't exactly the best way to strengthen your bones by breaking them apart... I mean all the clan members do was visit the clinic and they just prescribed to density enhancement treatment."
"...MOTHERFU--"
And so, Nanashi had learnt that day, he just strengthend his bones when there were easier ways to do it rather than the most painful methods besides jumping off of trees and hitting yourself against things to strengthen it.

Approved pops.

One handed seals - 5k

Long time ago in a land distant, far away and somewhat boring, well, simply Kirigakure back when Nanashi used to work for it as a Hunter-nin. Times were bloody, and he had always had red on his pale skin dyed crimson. That's how it was in the village of the Bloody Mist, and it was a village that mirrors the savage nature of the Kaguya, just as Nanashi mirrors the savageness of his clan. Always taking people out one by one systematically.

Stories often take in many places with a singular person, and this one was an enigmatic minion with a mask, physically and mentally as he looked at a ninja most scarred, unmasked, black, a female who was his worst arch-nemesis whom he had cornered, his opposite in every manner and way as she stood inches from an abyss almost endless and dark. Her form and his drowned in a downpour of rain as they looked at one another, hate in their eyes.

"Mouri, the crow has finally caught his prey, a rat which doth nought but gnarl and delay the inevitable."
"Inevitable? HAH! You think you won? You think that your first victory over me makes a difference in a war where I have promptly beaten you off several times has made you the ultimate and oh so glorious victor, eh you limpdick fucker?"

"...Shut the fuck up and die, BIATCH."

"What'd you just ca-- OOMPH!"

And so, Nanashi dispensed his rival with a quick kick to her stomach as she fell into the chasm endless and unseen. That he leaned in, sneaking a gaze at the chasm before leaving to disappear into the sea of trees called forest, his rival from Konoha finally dealt with, and now he was in the mood to watch some Sponjubobu back at his loft in Kirigakure, which may take a LONG while to walk back, so he best settle for some tent or an inn.
A few hours of walking in circles (literally), bored as he was, Nanashi decided to walk forth instead of circularly, unto a conveniently placed cave to which he has walked long and hard for ever so long and ever so hard for times long without an ending to his endless walk, which was long and hard at the point.
Walking for what seemed to be an eternity, eating, pooping, sleeping but not in that order, just to survive as he was pretty much lost as a motherfucker. Until he had met an olden man by a cave, to which he had decided, Nanashi that is, to stay there and talk to the man.
"Hohohohohoho, I had never seen a person as wretched as thou as thou makes it to BE. My eyes do not deceive me, your nature is as evil as the Xiun from the lands far from here to which you hear." An olden sage says.
"Pardon me, but shut the fuck up." Nanashi replies to the olden sage.
"Settled it is! You are evil to the brim with no redeeming qualities... young one, teach you I was the hand seal, but refused you have my teachings."
"..." There was a pause from Nanashi, as he contemplated on the perks on being able to perform handseals from one hand as he thought this through CAREFULLY, "No no no no NO no no! I am not evil, I am merely misunderstood! I saved the world many times... yeah! From bad guys, like the Konoha's Hokage, I am a real hero in my country where I have killed off slavers and saved orphans from them many times over." He crosses his fingers, lying.
"Then young man, why is your heart beating so as it were a lie as well? Lo then, I cannot behold to believe a liar and a wicked ma-- OOMPH!"
Feeling a jolt of air being forced out of his lungs, the sage sees he has been punched HARD by Nanashi, inhaling hard and exhaling as Nanashi would say: "Okay okay wanker, how about this? You TEACH ME or I beat the shit out of you, piss over your corpse and take your wallet!"
"Yes.... huh...huh.... very convincing argument... very well young man..." Panted the sage, Nanashi reclining his fist as the old man regains his breath, violence making a most convincing argument, "I will only teach you if you apply your rudest teachings to an army that commits evil... I see you can be a lesser evi-- better good than the evil Empire, and can stop the genocides taking place there, save the princess and stop the Empire's conquest and oppression of the people, granting everyone consent of the masses. You must sail to the West and stop the deranged tyrant known as Lord Qinshu who fancies himself an Emperor. A sorceror with a fifty million men legion strong army that can conquer this continent if he wanted and knew about it."
"Okay... so let me get this straight, you old fucker, you want ME to stop an army of FUCKING FIFTY MILLION ASSHOLE MEN who happened to conquer an EMPIRE, collectively can take on ANY ninja nations in the world, since they probably have WEAPONS that can annihilate the ninja nation, and you stake the entire world's fate on a COMMON NINJA'S hands JUST to learn ONE HANDED SEALS when I COULD have learnt it from the academy?!"
"That's exactly it young man, for you must merely believe it to be true than anything else. For there is no short cuts to power... except in your case, you tend to be impatient, hot headed, compensate for your lack of good wits by pretending common sense, and your--" Nanashi shook his fist at the olden sage, to which he cleared his throat, avoiding cricitism, "Erm... I mean you can do stuff if you put your mind to it, all I need from you is to inhale this elixir of life that I have brought from Mount Taishang."
"Fine fine, I will, BUT THEN I'll be on my way to destroy that stupid Empire of I-don't-give-a-fuck-about."
And so, Nanashi took the elixir from the old man as everything became hazy and dark after being taught one handed seals, only to clear up as things seem much lighter, his body feels powerful, nodding to the old sage as he would stand up and set off on his journey to stop an... Empire, a damn Empire capable of wiping him out ten times over JUST to save the ninja mainland continent, when really, it's just ALL of this for one handed seals. This journey was gonna span for miles anyways, kilometres, Nanashi didn't really pay attention to directions unless he was assed about it.
Hitching a ride on a boat, sailing the seas unsure which direction to go since he didn't really bother telling from the stars, the sun or the compass which direction he should go, or the map for that matter.

So, his ship, after days spent at sea, months even just scooping up any retarded fish that peaked it's head out of the water and eating it raw, since that's what they make Sushi out of, some fish causing sudden vomits whilst others were outright DELICIOUS. Still, a few days of scurvy, later on fixed with eating seaweed, and punching sharks in the face had landed Nanashi on a land FINALLY! Though it was by no means misty, so definitely not his beautiful village surrounded by women with severed heads of their enemies. Heck, even the trees were different, they were made of bamboos, and he can see Chinese-like towers in the distance as he believes he might've gotten into a prelude for a disaster...

Meanwhile...

Lord Qinshu of the Xiun had been proclaimed Emperor, anew because of his role in subduing the Tinua rebellion over and over again, slaughtering man, child, and woman to the last to get rid of every Tinua in existence. A special clan filled with special gifts that are special. Very special, so special that everyone of the descendents claim to be descendents of an olden noble bloodline, and were the only ones who are able to defeat him. For they have Chi techniques able to destroy his invincible and frightening aura, or some unexplained crap like that to which retains a sense of mystery.
Lord Qinshu had most of the descendents of Tinua wiped out except for the beautiful princess to whom he regards as a person he'll marry, so he'll have super powered children capable of conquering the realms beyond Chogoku such as the mysterious lands to East and West. But there is one problem in his plans -- the Princess, the last descendent of Tinua, had escaped from his dungeons and castles as the loyalists, last of her royal guards who evaded capture and played the role of guerrilla rebels, broke her out.
The Princess just so happened to be on her way to the beach only to fall down on her face after tiring strains of running constantly just to be away from the Empire. Nanashi just so happened to be on a boat, fending off mermaids with a paddle that keep leaping into his boat just because he called them ugly tarts, until the dingy hit the sandy shore as the ninja leaps off his boat and unto the beach, quite dazzling with the sunlight behind him.
The beautiful princess was a vacuum of attention that even the most distracted can't ignore her beauty, so dazzling, so sparkly in the sunlight as her eyes were piercing, even when closed.
Nanashi walks past her as he looks around only to see the Princess, gasping in shock at what a find he has discovered in astonishment, feeling so lucky that this was the circumstance that led him to her as he squatted down, reaching for her.
...
......
.........
The Princess sneaked a peak to see the dashing hero she expected as prophesized in the chronicles of future and pasts, only to see a masked bandit-like Nanashi swiping her coin purse, standing up with even her panties held by his hand as he took advantage of her unconsciousness, and most casually whistled and nonchalantly took a stroll towards the towers.
This despicable man is DEFINITELY not a hero as prophesized but villianous, EVEN WORSE than Lord Qinshu, at least Lord Qinshu had standards, except for the fact he slaughters villages, but is honest in his conduct despite his tyranny.
The princess stood up, huffing as she accusingly pointed the finger behind Nanashi, anger fuming unto her face as it swelled with red fury.
"You... YOU DESPICABLE VILLAIN! How DARE YOU steal from a member of the ROYAL FAMILY?!" She shrieked with anger.
"Hrm?" Nanashi stopped, turning around as he slips her wallet into his robe, facing the woman, "So you're a Princess eh?"
"Yes I am, pitiful peasant thief, now I WANT my money back, it's an ORDER."
"If you are a princess..."
"Yes, I am, I already said that, finally you come to realization how dire your crimes are."
"...Then it must mean you have lots of money in your wallet, a shitload of Ryo's... HOLY SHIT I AM RICH AND HIT THE JACKPOT!" Nanashi pumped his fist in victory.
"W-what?! You mean to tell me you ignorant buffoon that you are just stealing my royal treasury JUST LIKE THAT without fear that you'll be executed?!"
"Pffft, duh, I am a fucking ninja, BITCH. I take what I want and want what I take. What's there not to get?"
She turned around to think for a quick moment in her wisdom, this man certainly isn't a chosen one, but is definitely a scoundrel, and she is without her royal entourage right now, might as well make do with someone at least willing to talk to her without turning her over to Lord Qinshu, actually, the fact he hadn't done so means he is no ally of the Xiunese Emperor.
"He'll have to do for now... even though he is a scoundrel, he looks like he can handle a way with a sword, and the fact he wears a mask makes him a brigand of some sort, means he is definitely no friend of Lord Qinshu, maybe he is just a jerk with a heart of gold and might have a traumatic past, hence why he acts like a jerk... and secretly vies for my affections in the best way possible by inducing belligerent sexual tensions." She thought thoughtfully.
So, after her thoughts, finally seeing into Nanashi's true personality, although completely false as she sees the (completely non-) existent good in Nanashi, she finally lit up as her anger faded away, thinking she understood this evil and unsympathetic man to be a Hero of some sort of quality, as a roguish world weary and jaded type with a harsh past.
"Alright... consider that wallet your payment, you'll serve me and defeat Lord Qinshu of the Xiun, and you'll be very rich with a land and title of your own as my most valiant of Knights." She offers to the rather unimpressed Nanashi.
"You know, I was already here to kill that old fatty. And I don't care about riches, I can just kill rich people and take their money, so smell you later."
As he turned around, and started walking away, the Princess would say something along the lines of deflowering him like a tender turkey being defiled in every orifice which made him stop quizzically for further details about this enticement, after all, he can't help but notice how curvaceous and romp her ailing body is, and she isn't bad to look at either. A first time compared to all the fat prostitutes at Kumogakure he had to make do with, and most of the times he had the life of his almost squished out, literally.
"Keep on going, Princess, you peaked my interest." Nanashi quizzed.
"I long for a Knight by my said and a fellow King... and you aren't bad looking yourself... despite the mask you are wearing, I'll satisfy you financially, spiritually, and sexually... but when we bed one another.. please be gentle with me." She says, obviously faking it as she is keeping a poker face, her deal being nothing but a bluff.
"Well DAYUMN, now that you ask me that, I find myself convinced to support your retarded cause, Princess." Unsurprisingly, he has fallen for her tricks due to a thing called lust.
"It's not retarded."
"Of course it is, anyways, so I get to do to you like a nugget, AND I get untold riches, a Kingdom at my feet and some other nifty features. FUCK my mainland, this seems more like my sort of gig."
"Eugh... if you are to be King, you should stop being so vulgar..." She sighed, pointing to the ridge past the beach, "Over there is where you'll face Lord Qinshu, but beware, you can't kill him since you are OBVIOUSLY not of noble bloodlines, only I can kill him, which is why I need your help to go to Mount Tipang to the South where there will be a legendary sword that can be the only one that harms Lord Qinshu, since none of our bronze weaponries or onyx spears can harm him, none of that metal is even hard enough to stab him, except for foreign weapons, but we stopped getting ships from Tudi Bo Wu... and all weapons from there were banned and destroyed."
Nanashi reached for his waist as he unfurled a steely looking katana from the sheath.
"What? You mean like this weapon here? Pffft, it's so cheap I can basically wipe my asshole with it if I wanted to, but it'll hurt... I tried it before."
The Princess lit up with dazzling brilliance to see such a weapon in the stranger's possession.
"Tha-- that's the weapon that can kill him! Where did you possibly find this weapon of all places?! It's suppose to be rare, if not almost non-existent in these isles!"
"I bought it from a shop."
"What shop sells such rare items! I must know where they are, for my people, for my clan."
"Whoo there missy, what Kekkei Genkai are you from?"
"Kekkei... Genkai?"
"Bloodline, blah blah blah, that shit, it wasn't there from yesterday, boob features."
"How dare you call me BOOB FEATU--"
"Right, here is where I interrupt your Pee Emm Essing, see, I got it for cheap, and it's across the seas, I spent only a single Ryo on this piece of shit sword, literally has a piece of shit stain on it that I somehow can't scrub off."
"Eww.... WHAT THE FUCK?! Okay, I am NOT marrying you anymore, you are the most... UNCOUTH MAN I'VE EVER MET...! SEE?! YOU HAVE ME CURSING AS WELL!"
Nanashi held his hands against his ears, blocking out the siren's wails and shrieks that would've shattered ear drums, 'twas too annoying to behold and lo.
"Would you SHUT UP?! Good grief, I'll just meet you at that mountain, I prefer NOT being with you when I travel, I mean sheesh, I am not an object to tantrum at! I am a human being with feelings!"
The princess was struck by grief, to which she had looked down sympathizing with his plight as she was most rude to the lewd gentleman.
"I apologize... that was most unkind of me young sir, I shouldn't have went off at ye like that, I normally treat people kindly, it's just that my family died and the--"
"...Oh shit..." Nanashi said, in lieu to the fact Kirigakure MIGHT have been responsible for bloodline genocides on this island as well (really they weren't, but Nanashi thinks otherwise.)
"...Good sir, what ails you?"
"Erm... well... how shall I put this in the lightest and most politically nice context possible? YOUR ENTIRE CLAN WAS FUCKING MURDERED BY KIRIGAKURE NINJAS! AND I AM FROM THERE!"
"W-what?! You're Lord Qinshu's mercenaries?! I KNEW I shouldn't have believed in you so far, you seemed like you weren't working for him, but YOU'RE JUST ANOTHER SCOUNDREL LIKE THEM!"
"I think we got to the scoundrel page already, now then, how much is Lord Qinshu offering for your head?"
"Pardon?! You're really not willing to be wed by beautiful me and have a Kingdom at your feet? Not only are you lowly, but you're stupid and evil eh? I should've that you are evil all round, your Chi was too malevolent, unjust deathly murderous aura lingered far too near to you for you to be considered ANYWHERE near redemption... I can see you killed even children... your true form is nowhere near that of a kind human but of a horned demon... YOU MONSTER! You are nothing more than that which wears the guise of a human, vile EVEN more than Lord Qinshu himself, repugnant and filthy and..." The Princess kept whining about how Nanashi was evil until he leaned down to pick up a piece of a shell, flinging it at her to which she dodged, breaking out of her whining trance.
"You know, that reward money can buy me slaves off of the market, and they will be very willing to have orgies at anytime I want, Yuki slaves that is, and marriage doesn't rub off on me quite well, I hate having commitments to virgin ladies who DON'T KNOW how to do anything right in bed. Except for crabs, having none of those they do pretty well."
"I should have figured... you are also a pervert, PREPARE YOURSELF FIEND!"

DANANANANANANANANANANANANANAANANA!




Strolling away, Nanashi shrieked in girly horror to see that he had picked the WRONG bone to fight, there was probably a reason as to why the trackers never bothered to chase her after being so far from the main army, which just so happens to be 50 million strong, or was it 500 million strong? Who cares, million is a lot. The Princess's back ripped apart as her delicate and beautiful skin deformed into a hunched leathery back, fingers enlargening to claws as her form swelled with size, standing erect, a good twelve feet taller than Nanashi as she had sprouted white dove-like wings, her clothing tattered as she was a furless beast with hair on her head present. Snarling with her beak as she probably lost all senses, or just didn't look like she had any, who cares? Nanashi was in a bind, and she DID mention earlier that he just needed his very cheap Katana to kill Qinshu... big whoop.
So, the Princess dove towards Nanashi, crashing unto the sand as the ninja leapt back to keep his distance, avoiding her tackle, knowing his peril that awaits if he had even stood for a moment. If anything, this was the most INCONVENIENT MOMENTS to rain as the sand turn rather muddy, meaning the ground was more slippery. Great, just another fucking slip up besides Princess Sunshine here trying to tear him apart, because apparently, HER BLOODLINE CAN TURN HER INTO A MONSTROUS WOMAN MUTANT THING! Having unplucked itself from the sandy now muddy ground to stare at the ninja.
Damn foreign bloodlines.
"Is this a good opportunity to tell you that you have LOVELY hair and that I changed my mind and want to marry you?"
"RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWRRRRRR." It roared.
"Guess not." He quipped sarcastically.
The beast had spread its legs as it brushed its feet across the moist sand, rain drops moistening the both of them in liquid as Nanashi knew that fire will be less effective in this environment. The monster in fury, charged at Nanashi, as Nanashi leaned down before springing up, leaping above the beast as it stopped, skidding across the sand as it fell flat on its face, missing Nanashi by several feet to which Nanashi landed on the muddy ground, taking a stance prone to stabbing with his Katana as he wielded it with one hand. As if it were a ninjato. But then, he took another stance of furious turnip, turning around to show his behind to the enemy, as required in the discipline, before pulling his pants down to reveal his backside to the enemy, slapping it with his free hand whilst the sword was still pointing forward but the other way.
"Na-na-na-na-na! Can't touch this BIYATCH!" He slapped his pale white butt in a bid to taunt her, looking behind.
It worked quite well.
The beast still had figments of humanity in it, which made Nanashi just see it was an echoing creature, a monster that has humanity, whilst Nanashi is a human that has monstrosity. It made the ninja twitch for just a moment, that thing... it DISGUSTS him, it has to be wiped out at ALL COSTS, it was nothing more than an abomination, a human monster with restraint... yet how could it be THAT strong with humanity, something that anchors a person down, give it strength?!
He'll have to prove the entire thing wrong, she only has strength because she is a monster that is just as a monster, not a humane monster, and with that new found conviction, the monster charged and Nanashi looks in front of him, there was a tree.
Perfect.
So putting his pants up to cover his pasty white ass, and turning his frontal body to face the Princess, she charged. Leaping out of the way with the beast hitting against the tree as it broke and fell on her, holding her in place as Nanashi would slam his palm unto the muddy sand to stop himself from slipping further, standing up as he leaps unto her back, and slams his Katana's blade into her spine and unplucks it before leaping off, whipping his blood stained sword to the side as blood whips unto the muddy sand, sheathing his Katana and as it was fully inserted, the beast fell.
So, Nanashi saw the beast became a woman once more, and because the Princess transformed into a great huge beast, her clothes were in tatter. So, Nanashi took a naked Princess to some abandoned Kirigakure trade warehouse for some delicious deflowering.

5 hours later at the Qinshu main army camp...
"Where it the Princess?!" He slams his fist on the table, Lord Qinshu being extremely displeased.
He was inside his large war room, being a tent with a table and a map of the entire country. His generals cowering before his presence except for his second in command, to which Lord Qinshu knows him to be reliable. An entire army of 50 million outside his tent, encircling him yet their loyalty is spurned out of fear than love, making them very reliable. All of them dressed in the manner of the Chinese in real life equivalence.
Though the messenger bolted into the tent as he kneeled before Lord Qinshu, head inclined to the elderly man.
"LORD QINSHU! I bring news! The Princess... SHE HAS BEEN CAPTURED AND SHE IS BEING BROUGHT HERE, PERMISSION TO LET THE MERCENARY IN!"
"Granted." The grizzled man in his 50's said, nodding.
Nanashi dragged along a woman in a sack, with strings of sticky liquid all over her face as her eyes were peacefully closed, she was snoring which meant she was alive, her head sticking out of the sack anyways. She was thrown to the table in the tent as Nanashi had his hand behind his back, making some motions with it singularly.
"So, I want my money. The bounty on the Princess, ALIVE, oh youngest and most turnip of Lord of Lords. Emperor of the cabbage, King of the Sugar, and Disco Daddy all the way, or I just take her and offer her to your neighbour." Nanashi gave a bow.
"...What...? This isn't a market, foolish man! I posted a bounty of thousands of golden Yuan on the girl, you take it graciously or I simply take the Princess from you AND YOUR HEAD."
"Fair point, you can have her, but I want my money or else I will write you letters everyday saying how angry I am."
Lord Qinshu nodded, scowling at the stranger and his... stupidity, gesturing for his men to hand him an entire bag of gold bars to which Nanashi walked outside. And just looked at the gold as his eyes sparkled at how rich he became. So, when he got a good few feet, well, try a mile away from the entire army, he snapped his fingers and there was a LARGE EXPLOSION that wiped out so many, but that was pretty much a fraction of that much soldiers. Like 1.5, a nit pick, a prick, nothing but a simple poke, a pinch, SHIT, look at the size of the army, it was nothing but VAST! DAYUMN. So, Nanashi did what any sensible man would do -- run away.
It was only after several months in the continent, Nanashi living off of the gold given by Lord Qinshu did he live happily ever after in the lands. Though the Princess died, being raped by Nanashi and was blown to smithereens, since the insides of the sack were lined with explosive tags, and the most explosive and volatile sort fetched from the abandoned Kirigakure warehouse, the tags weren't seen with much value to the Xiun because of how useless it seemed, hence left there. Killing all the top honchos of Lord Qinshu, and his second in command... though Nanashi looked behind to see a now muscular man with a beard, given youth as he had a frightening chakra displaying outwardly, or Chi as the Xiun would call it, walking away from the burning tent as he was shirtless... probably to blind Nanashi with his chiselled chest.
"You DARE try to ASSASSINATE ME, LITTLE RAT?! I WILL DESTROY YOU!!!" Lord Qinshu roared at the top of his lungs as he was able to pin point Nanashi a mile away from the army, sneaking away, just like that from a single gaze amongst thousands. Nanashi unsheathed the Katana from his back as he started sprinting HARD into the forest.
Though what attempts to get away from the 'half-robot-from-the-future' Lord Qinshu as Nanashi would think, would end in failure as the man somehow flash stepped in front of him. Having left an entire crater behind him that had left his army pulverized from a single quick boost of speed.
Nanashi ducked instinctively as his eyes widened, "HOLY SHIT!" He thought in shock, seeing what appeared to be a blur of a kick that would've knocked his head off his shoulders had he not ducked. The Ninja then focused more and more unto avoiding, using every fibre of his muscles and his ninja-like agility to dodge every hit if anything, barely, that Lord Qinshu was so swift, losing JUST a blink would end Nanashi's life.
So switching to the offensive as he dodged an uppercut by side stepping, Nanashi reeled his Katana back before swiftly thrusting forth towards Lord Qinshu, the Lord having easily dodged the thrust by merely stepping to the side, yet Nanashi swung it as planned but hadn't gotten to hit the man, clenching his teeth in panic as he started sweating.
"SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HE IS SO FAST...! That's what SHE said! Anyways, HOLY SHIT HE IS FAST! I gotta kill his ass, so, time to play dirty."
Nanashi held the Katana next up with one hand as he swung his sword around with less precision yet had done handseals for some imaginary move he had done. Somehow Nanashi blinked as he had electrocuted himself as things seemed hazy, having the legendary Lightning Release Armor at his disposal before doing handseals again, feeling his chest breeze as he molds his Chakra once more. Everything seeming more surreal as things started bending with Lord Qinshu being incinerated by what appears to be Goenkyu, the army being decimated instantly without any idea of just WHAT THE FUCK happened right now.
It seemed there was a crated equivalent to an atomic bomb on steroids that had incinerated Nanashi, Lord Qinshu being stabbed by a Katana, turned into a pile of bird poop, the army turned into a terra cotta, and that is how Nanashi single handedly ended the Xiunese army at the expense of himself, vividly remembering every detail of one handed seals as he suddenly snapped his eyes open, bolting forward as he sweated HARD.
Somehow his legs feeling moist as he looked down to see him only in a Fundoshi, and a note left next to him.

Quote :

Haha, haha, haha. I took your pants, that's payment for the one handed seal, everything I told you was just a dream, that elixir I gave you to drink was just a dream concotion. Haha, haha, haha.

And so, Nanashi crumpled that piece of paper as he bit down on his bottom lips, eyes straining with red veins whilst his face turned red.
"MOTHERFU--!!!"

And so, that is how Nanashi learnt how to do one handed seals.

o-O
Stamped

Bone Density training = 1k - Steel

Nanashi was having another day, his bones are as tough as irons after spending several weeks in the hospital going through bone therapy, yet he was summoned before the Elder once again, the guy who fancies Hello Kitty just as Nanashi does. Anyways, Nanashi was aching as a motherfucker ever since that training, and the bone therapy turns out it was a refreshing manner of training, until he was told this by the Elder once he got into his house.
"Bone therapy? HAW HAW HAW Hoho! There is no such thing FOOL, you must do it naturally, or else you'll never be strong incarnage Kaguya like ME, young'un."
"Eh?! But I already feel my bone are as strong as steel, so what the fuck am I bothering to do with one of your stupid-- smart tests when I already have strong bones? I mean FUCK, I don't see a point in this cra-- very useful method you give me." Nanashi complained and bitched.
"SILENCE OR ELSE I'LL KILL YOU."
"FINE FINE."
"Good, I want you to go to the highest mountain possible where our ancestors have long trained to make their bones hoho denser, hoho, and you need to do the same hoho training otherwise I'll never consider you hoho strong incarnate hoho, are we understood and clear?"
"..." There was an abrupt silence from Nanashi, "What ever happened to that smacking my face against some FUCKING WOOD training?! EH?! And what the fuck am I supposed to do anyways for my training?! I mean all you basically told me to do is just to go up the mountain and train, and there are NO TREES in the mountains to smash my FUCKING HEAD ON. I mean FUCK, I'll be mentally handicapped after this, and I already had bone densifying therapy, why do I have to train this way which is PAINFUL?! I put emphasis on pain by the way."
"Because I said so... and..." The elder snapped his fingers as several Kaguya's holding some rocket launchers pointed at Nanashi within the room, "If you don't do it, I'll blow you hoho to kingdom come, hoho hoho hoho, is that understood hoho?"
"I can see you're making your point PERFECTLY clear, you convinced me with your very eloquent argument and I'll go train right at once."
And so Nanashi departed, but not before being greeted by some guy, another Kaguya clan peep that suffered the same training as him. He waved, and he had several scars on his head, blunt fmro the looks of it, so they look less dense by skin most likely, probably one of those failed types that couldn't even master their regeneration right, hence why he looks so fucked up in appearance like that. A history of banging heads in Kaguya clan has left many of the clan members most medically inadequate, so the ones you'd see as medical nins are the rare ones who didn't bang their heads against the tree and fucked up their minds.
In this case, this guy looks like he sure lost a couple of IQ points, Nanashi himself, was on the verge of insanity rather than stupidity, having jumbled his head to a point his thought processing has become... murky. Probably the origins of his incoherent and strange speech founded in the future, and steel-like bones so to say. An origin and a chronicle of a history.
So, skip back to the part where that Kaguya peep pops up and waves to Nanashi and has an ugly forehead, fugly ass forehead.
"Hey thar Nanashi... durr... HAW HAW HAW, I hear ya goin' ta da mountains of dewm, HAW HAW HAW, to baing yer head against the stones, HAW HAW HAW!" The redneck sounding Kaguya says.
"Bang my heads against stones... STONES?! What the fuck is wrong with modern bone density therapy?! EH?! Can't I just be a NORMAL PERSON and be strong the CONVENTIONAL AND HARMLESS WAY?!" Nanashi was infuriated with the whole ordeal evidenced by his louder than life shouts of protests against the stupid Kaguya system.
"HAW HAW HAW, you so silly Nanashi, HAW HAW, ya know dat dis training been aroun' for hundreds of years n' it worked jus' fine with everywan eylse, espeshully awor uncle Kimimaro--"
"Great great great grandfather, dick face."
"Heyo! My fawce ain't like a duck! I am a human of the mayn desceynt."
"Oooohhh, how much energy did that take JUST to strain a brain fibre of yours? Aww... did you just pop a nerve cord and a piece of you died inside there already?" Nanashi taunted.
"I thaynk dat I los' mah smarts frawm dat, but dat not is my pawnt, my pawnt eyz dat you smaysh your head to the rock ayn da mountains, and be perfectest and strongest and bestest as me! I is like a strawng Kaguya cuz my bones are harder dan yours, I train and I is better dan you, Nanashi, smell ya later, HAW HAW HAW HAW, DAWRK--."
"SHUT YOUR FACE BITCH AND RESPECT MAH AUTHORITY!" Nanashi's voice boomed to epic proportions equivalent to a sexy man lion that can shut stupid retards up, in this case, the Kaguya peep.
The Kaguya peep whimpered from Nanashi's epic manliness, as he slithered away, defeated as Nanashi was the only person with such a voice to put down mighty (stupid and fucking retarded in his case down ultimately). Nanashi then decided to leave the compound past a very foresty forest.
He went around and walked on his epic voyage for quite a while, thinking to himself that all of his rationale WILL disappear if he just tries to do this like the Elder demanded, and he DID make a convincing argument involving rocket launchers, which was pretty convincing indeed, so, Nanashi went up the high mountain and did just that, where he got his brain jumbled up as a result. Ultimately coming back with bones as strong as steel after leaping off a height and relying on a medical nin to heal him. Becoming pretty powerful and able to stop sword attacks with his bare arms... bones, right.

Level 2 Regeneration - 0.5k

Once upon a time, a rather changed Nanashi embarked upon a therapy to which he was standing in a line for many hours, a regeneration enhancement therapy from a hospital, away from the Elders that imparted the title strong incarnate upon Nanashi, to whom he took JUST delightfully so with delightful delight. In other words, he was pretty fucked up in the head ever since that day, and pretty much can never pin down a single personality, but he can go on his goals, which are pretty spontaneous these days, and are varying typically.
So, he was in a Kaguya exclusive hospital, since Kaguya's are VERY different from your run of the mill people, they had different bone structures, long lengths of a rod for the males, females being much well formed and had very supple bodies, basically being the jealousy and desire of every non-Kaguya around, being fantasized and the females being frequent models in PlayNin magazines. Nanashi was none of that, he had premature wrinkles, a dirty stubble and a very bored look that puts ladies off unless they're into that gruff and rough gent's look. Of course some other theories exist that Nanashi might have a breath that breathes out fire, and might've pulled out a Hanzo since that's the case, but others debunk the theory in the Kaguya clan saying Nanashi doesn't really care if he'd burn someone or not, pretty much he is a dickwad, and mostly a self centered asshole. His face might be hiding hideous teeth as he is never seen grinning as they would say, along with multitudes of other theories in existence about why Nanashi wears a mask and covers his hair. Or a lack of it since that's the case.
Anyways, Nanashi was behind a really big fat ass woman which farted as she walked, and her shirt were ripping apart as her butt linings were exposed to Nanashi which made his face pale from how it was horrendous and horrible to gaze upon. Since she is a fat ugly fat woman which is fat and ugly and a woman.
So, he devised a method to deal with her, he reached for his pockets and flung a bar of very smelly chocolate that smells of curry to the side as the woman smelt it. She bolts to the side and leaps out of the window where Nanashi theorizes she might've caused an earthquake or split an entire hidden village in half somewhere on the other side of the flat world, since the world isn't really round, it's flat. A retard would say it is round, but that's not the case.
So Nanashi goes to the Doctor who has applied some seals all over his body, feeling like a paint job canvas, and Nanashi had to have his body tattooed in the nude by a hot female doctor, so it wasn't really a problem since she touched him everywhere and saw his mentionables. So after applying the seals, and amping him up, she did some hand seals, gave him his clothing as he went his merry way after wearing his clothes, feeling that his regeneration is much faster than usual.

Stamped

Level 3 Regeneration - 1k

In a day where Nanashi sought out to actually increase his regeneration, he heard of tales exotic and mysterious from people who are exotic and mysterious mysteriously so, exotically too. So he had a self-fulfilled quest to go to Mount Poontang where the legendary elixir of eternal life is present. Or at least something that'll fill him up and is stronger than the shit Kaguya liquor he has and probably pack even more punch to him so that he may feel finally having founded the punchy punchity liquor-like elixir to in fact make him have the BEST drunken binge of them all.
So Nanashi set out to go in some aimless direction as most adventures begin -- by aiming through pretty much any random directions and walk endlessly. Yep, so he stopped by an inn and had his way in the brothel enjoyable before running off with the knowledge that he has impregnated one of the ladies there with his spawn, his child. SHIT. So, he did what any sane man would do in the event he has forgotten to wear a condom or take some abortion pill; run as fast away as possible before he is forced to be paying like a father and take care of his child.
Anyways, he pretty much went off in the same direction he was walking through in the forests, holding his unsheathed Katana to his shoulder to the right with the flat edge rested upon his skin as it was held by his right only to be in a graveyard. Some random graveyard he has never seen in the map, then again, he never travelled by map in these sorts of adventures. Looking around, there was a fog and a couple of grave robbers, those sort of necrophiliac sorts he best just ignore those sickos.
Walking along his way only to sneak a glance at one of those supposed grave robbers, to which Nanashi's Asian eyes widened to be very huge, he almost looks like a Karifornyanun barbarian with how large his eyes were. Those 'graverobbers' were in fact some sort of strange beasts with humps on their shoulders that looked bulbous and grotesque, maybe add in a few leaking out bits of something probably sticky (not sperms), yep, definitely some unholy beasts of some sort, and damn right ugly, all ugly people are unholy, though Nanashi doubts that thing he is looking at is a person, so it has no feelings and it is okay to kill it.
Then again, since when does Nanashi care for any justifications to kill someone? Ah well. So he points his Katana at the beast, runs towards it and slices it in half then runs away as the rest of the beasts chase it, dropping that said Katana in place to sprint way too fast, that said Katana was his second, in fact, he has a spare which is a good thing too. So, as Nanashi bravely run away from the face of his enemies, or newly created one, onwards he goes on his adventures.
Leaving behind this putrid place of infection behind as he ran away very bravely as he left the enemies behind. Going onwards to a location new as he had stopped by an inn. Some inn for some odd reason that people keep disappearing in, he can't blame them to be in an inn where everyone disappears in.
Yeah, there were strippers here, as the inn is in fact... populated entirely by women, most of them scantily clad. So, Nanashi figured this was the best break EVER. He went into in the inn and sat in the inn by the entrance as ladies started crowding around him and pouring drinks and all that, heck one of them sang as Nanashi's eyes boiled to be open widely. Red veins appearing around it, eyebrows furrowing to be really mighty furious-like as he stood up and punched the two ladies attending to him.
"LIARS! FRAUDS! This isn't a real pub, THIS IS A SIREN IN an... INN! HAH! I AM UNTO YOU SHE-DEMONS! I shall vanquish thee to... OBLIVION." Nanashi screamed out as he took his Katana out from his sheathe, the other one he didn't lose, and stabbed the one in front of him as the Sirens took on a truer form.
"Curses! How did you know?! No males EVER have shown how sexy they are by showing they are more perceptive than they are... that is really hot... okay, we're not gonna eat you, we're just gonna bed you and have you impregnate us.. one at a time..."
"Orrrr... I can just deflower you into oblivion, that works out too."
And so, Nanashi has spent a night at the Siren Inn, NOT BEING EATEN by the Siren as he left the inn so relaxed-like. He should visit these parts more often, who knew unnatural Youkai of sorts were such a fun folk? There was all these talks about how evil they were, and they are, but evil is sexy, and Nanashi is testament to that, the self-proclaimed lord of the sexy anyways. So he must continue his adventures to Mount Poontang where he just went to a mountain, having been given directions by the local evil siren demons to the Mountain as he was hiking up, well really just walking up. Following some steam that he sees from the distance only to see the waters.
So, in glee, he leaps into the water and drinks it as much as he can, making back pedals and doing cannon balls until he feels just so... invigorated and even younger, his stiff limbs feel more fluid as he in fact feels younger. Much much younger. So, he left as he intentionally took out his Katana and sliced through his skin, only after a while it closed up with no scar. Awesome, his regeneration has drastically improved to heal in such a short amount of time as if nothing had ever happened, and it barely used up any Chakra too, which is quite the perk. And so, Nanashi left off once more in his quest to get better as he goes to the Siren Inn for some jolly good old fun.

1722 words = 2k regeneration (in a post) - 500 words tax = 1.5k words required met successfully.

And once again, Nanashi sought out to get more powerful ONCE AGAIN in an effort to regenerate so he can actually become an even more powerful Kaguya even more powerfully so. Therefore he adventured out into the wilds again where he had sought to in fact get to become powerful... ONCE AGAIN in his quest for power. Not those illegal sorts, just a little bit of a questing, which was pretty much fun and all. It was typically just like all of his other quests, just walk around and HOPE he can in fact get better, or something like that, who knows? Last quest he was on involved him impregnating a bunch of she-demons who were in all extents, hot as Hell, or Yomi in Nanashi's version, but then again he is a Jashinist, pain is pleasure, but it still hurts like a mofo, so Nanashi doesn't know when he'll ever get used to pain, sure it is numbed up at this point, but regeneration has it's perks. And he is gonna QUEST to find said perks! So therefore he just went off on his quests as he usually does.
Going into some area, random it was, and pretty much dull at the same time but that's how all of his quests start off in the name of the legendary instant regeneration perk of the Kaguya. Or was it just regeneration? Healing factors can be a tad bit annoying, ever since that time Nanashi had drunken the elixir, he thinks that he has gotten to the peak of his abilities, but alas! That is not the case. He will persevere no matter what, or just stop by the same Siren inn and enjoy his time there, after all, who says quests don't need a little silverlining such as booze, sex and more sex?
And so our heroically dashing and handsome hero sets off (he is really the most despicable villain around, but he thinks himself a hero). Always thinking he is a hero when really he is just that one big jerk who cannot fathom just how evil he is. He kills children, puppies, and all that shit with not a concern over the human life and destruction he causes in such a short time without even caring about who he and he doesn't kill. Yet he is arrogant enough to believe himself good and all that which further makes him deluded... of course taking into account he believes himself good in the eyes of Jashin. Nothing else, nothing more, and it is required and compulsory for Nanashi to kill something every now and then. Animals work out as temporary solution but humans are always needed to be eliminated.
Being a ninja has its advantages though. Where he has easier access to murdering others with not a single remorse with him really. Anyways, so he decided he shall quest off to the land he hates most... Kariforniyanan, land of the barbarians called 'tourists'. NANASHI FUCKING HATES THEM. He figured if there is anywhere else he can become a good regenerator at, it'd be at Kariforniya. A place surrounded by danger, hostility and DANGER. A place so hated that Nanashi figured it's the best place to get regeneration because.... he has absolutely no clue as to why really, he is just making bullshit up to himself on the go to justify the fact he is going there.
Anyways, he got in a boat, rowing rowing rowing the fucking boat. Rowing all the way to the place where he just rows like HELL. Eventually landing short of his destination, which was NOT Kariforniya but somewhere else. Somewhere foreign and had a shroud of black cloud made of hate, evil, pus, maliciousness and darkness. In other words, it was just a really dark cloud that blotted out the sun's rays... wow, Nanashi can already tell he FUCKING hates this place. There were many extremely pale people with fangy teeth and sparkly eyes... and it occured to Nanashi, most of them are fan girl material stock freaks of nature. They were apt with muscles, and were somehow... filled with couples, with ugly girls courting their dream men.
'Twas a terrible place for Nanashi to be at because of how alien and stupid this land looked to be like. But whatever, he did not want to deal with some of the shit of how stupid this land is, and is more concentrated on finding something to help him regenerate even faster than usual. So Nanashi took out his Katana from his SHEATHE which was supposed to be ATTACHED TO HIS OBI SASH BELT. He held the Katana from the grip. Making some cool pose where he flexes his butt and smiles and goes, "TEEHEE."
BUT SUDDENLY. A vampiru police officer came up, and he was all sparkly-like, he was wearing tights and looked more like some BDSM fetishist. So Nanashi scowled and growled at the police officer. The police officer barks back and goes saying something. He wanted to give him a ticket for illegally entering Twayaraito and wants his license.
"I can't give you my license officer." Says Nanashi.
"Why not?" Says the officer who was like all faggy and sparkly.
"BECAUSE YOU ARE A FAGGOT AND I DON'T TRUST YOU." Said Nanashi, who decapitated the officer's head and kicked it into the ocean before running into this dark and foreboding land. Bloody sword being sheathed.
He then jumped and landed on the ground, and ran into the forests where then he ran and ran. He used his legs to run. And put them on the ground and then run. That's what he did. He kicked a couple of squirrels on the way and maybe a few golfers. Then he kept running after using the bathroom after bathroom emergency.
So after he left, he would try to go around walking, going to the city. After he got out of the forest. Nanashi made sure to beat the shit out of a passerby and steal his clothings. So he wore the clothing over his own ninja gear, and hoped nobody would notice. Walking around the streets populated by so many fat and ugly heart shaped headed girls. And then there was them sparkly kids, or boys, who held unto these girls, as if they were on steroids, somehow... they exposed the most out of their chests as if it was a bid to attract unattractive girls. It worked.
Maybe there was a few lizzie couples around. Nanashi couldn't tell, girls are awfully affectionate with each other. So, he went to a poor hobo (for since when was there a rich hobo anyways?) and kneeled down, looking at him with his eyes. Very intensely might he add. The hobo was scared shitless, so Nanashi didn't care. It was in an alley way in a city and all.
"Why are there so many fags around here?" Asks Nanashi.
"You're not from around here are you? Yes... yes... you aren't." Replies hobo.
"No am not, that's why I asked, you douche."
"Sheesh, no need to be harsh. I thought you were a local because of your attire."
"Oh? This? Dumbshit, this is a DISGUISE. Because I am not from around here."
"That explains a lot, well, ever since this one woman, Setafoni Meyeru came in, she used her plague to transform everyone into this... the rest of us who were too ugly, had immunity. So we are unrich and are living in misery. Could it be you came here to liberate us ugly people?"
"No, I just came here to practice some shit. Let my regeneration kick in and get powerful. Do these fags know how to regenerate?"
"Well... they have superspeed, super strength, super healing, can sparkle, can read minds, and some of them can transform into wolves. There is no chance in Hell you can fight them on even grounds, you're just a normie."
"No bitch. I am a ninja." Nanashi punched the hobo to the face. A casual punch fractured that over assertive bitch's face into skewed up gory chunk of meat instead of a recognizable ugly and dirty face.
So Nanashi stood up, after kneeling down to accommodate the hobo's slouched height. Unsheathing his Katana as he would take walks around the street, getting suspicious look from those sparkly bastards. Eventually making his way to the biggest building around. It is probably that one which is tallest. The place where this bitch which made this mess lives in. So Nanashi ran there and got there.
He killed a few people on the way who were sparkly, and the sparkles made Nanashi feel invigorated with vigour. So he met a giant vampire thing and fought her. He slashed her, but she couldn't die. She just humped a few juiced up steroid monkey olive skinned boys and she SUDDENLY gets strong.
"How do I kill her?" Nanashi asks himself.
"You just have to... believe. And fucking stab those boys really." Nanashi's imaginary friend, Ted, who appeared conveniently in time said.
"Yes! I will." Nanashi was happy.
So he charged and killed those steroid monkey human things whom she humps, then FINALLY slashed Setafani Meyeru and she DIED.
Suddenly, the entire land began sinking to the ground. She was the only thing holding it afloat. So Nanashi started running like HELL. He sliced up all the vamipeiru on the way as their sparkles rubbed off on Nanashi and gave him a faster regeneration. They attached to his skin and infected his DNA, changing his attributes as Nanashi ran off, sparkling and the like... until he got on the boat, and paddled the FUCK as fast as possible.
He then paddled and paddled so fast, he was some miles away from the island only to see it suddenly sink underground, and a massive explosion happened which caused a tsunami. The tsunami capsized Nanashi's boat as he held his breath, and before long, the Tsunami went so fast, it flung him out SOMEHOW and into the ninja mainlands. Mostly Kirigakure. From there, Nanashi's wounds healed very quickly. But without the sparkles to them. It was the sparkles that made Nanashi the man he is... or something. He has no idea what the fuck happened. But that's how it happened. And THIS is how the tale of Nanashi's powers came to be.